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« الحمامة و الفاجوميTo all mothers?(yes, a question) »

Opposite sex Friends?

  • By: Qwaider

  • On:Tuesday, March 20, 2007 7:28:57 PM
  • In:Thoughts
  • Viewed: (13601) times

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    Rated 4.5/5 stars (246 votes cast)

    Every once in a while, I will come across a situation which affirms to me that members of opposite sex can not be friends, no matter what everyone thinks. It just doesn't work like that. True, women can have absolutely no interest in some (or most) men, but there is this genetic perversion in every man, the need to spread their seed!

    I know some might think I'm crazy, but I'm starting to believe that regular friendship between any heterogeneous couple is almost impossible. Because it will always be polluted with the way many men think.

    I know this does sound like "Harry met sally" cliche or "Ladder theory" but I find it very true that women will categorize men in two major buckets. Friends, and Lovers. Each having certain privileges and are expected to perform certain activities. As for the more linear male brain, it's how attractive (not pretty) a woman is.

    Think of it this way, A woman's brain has an 2 axis, one for friendship, and another for acceptance. The higher a person scores on acceptance, the better their chances of being a lover. The higher their score on friendship, the better friends they are.

    The Acceptance axes for women is multipart, it's not composed of a single item. In fact, so many factors come in to play here. Money, beauty, power, age, influence, and all the positive power adjectives are compounded here to generate the acceptance score. An ugly rich man, will probably score high on the acceptance scale, while a handsome poor one might not be as lucky. But it depends how rich, and how handsome. But all play in

    As for the more primitive and more linear male brain. It's just the acceptance scale, friends don't even register. So what stops males from falling for every woman in their life? Many factors come to the rescue, from religion to virtue, to common sense

    Why is it designed this way? I'm sure there is some deep rooted reason for all of his, ever since we were cave men. Remember we were cave men WAY BEFORE we had civilizations, and for far longer periods of history. This civilization "thing" barely started 10,000 years ago, which is way less than the time we spent as cave dwellers or just nomads out in the open

    Spreading some one's seed is a simple act, while caring for this seed takes a very long time. That's probably why women are not obsessed with acceptance of many partners while men are. Genetics tells us, he who has more children, his genes will probably out-survive the others.

    Back to this day and age, would there be a completely innocent relationship between men and women? Absolutely. But do men think of more? Probably more than women

    Other Memories Documented on March 20
    « الحمامة و الفاجوميTo all mothers?(yes, a question) »

    Memories....

    • #1
    • 7usam
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 8:42:41 PM
    so what you say is womens brain is more advances and complicated than the linear man brain :)
    • #2
    • Nido
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 8:44:53 PM
    I believe that good friendships can last forever, and stay on the same level, but being a friend with the opposite sex wont stay on the same level if one part got involved in a romantic or a serious relationship with someone else. Even if both friends were deeply honest with each other from the very beginning, addressing limits, stil it wont be the same later on, the friendship will either be ruined or the serious relationship will be in danger...therefore, I think, its better to stay on the safe side and enjoy the healthy kind of friendship with the same sex:D
    7usam, Maybe :)
    It can certainly handle more complexity
    Hmmmm,
    I donno about that...maybe !!
    Bas about the advanced brain...wala marra...wala momken,
    Men has the most advanced Brains in the history, it's so advanced that their owners dont have a clue how to run it !
    LOL Sharifo ....
    Allah ykoon fi 3onak ...
    • #6
    • Vas
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 10:39:31 PM
    Strange to claim the cave-phase theories and atavism. I do not comprehend at all the text. It does not make sense to me. My best friends have always been women. I appreciate their sensitivity, the many dimensions of their criteria, the parallel development of mental, spiritual, and emotional qualities. No greater teacher than my mom for instance. No wiser support than the one my women friends have been offering. The rest, about spreading seeds, are surprising masks for sexism.
    You're accusing me of sexism!? I'm just a social observer Vas, you have many ways that regulates and supresses ideas and tendencies that doesn't mean that they don't exist.
    • #8
    • Faten
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 10:54:16 PM
    I don't understand this, but I have so many friends from the opposite sex that I consider to be like brothers to me. And would NEVER EVER think of them otherwise. I'm sure they love and honor me as if I was their sister too
    • #9
    • Faten
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 11:01:09 PM
    Sharifo... what do you mean men have more advanced brains!? That's too chauvinistic. Like as if, the world is not run by a bunch of crazy men running around killing people!
    At least women don't have enough testosterone to just fight for no reason like MOST men do!
    From what I understand about your male acceptance scale is that it is not about spreading seeds, it is about male brains only being obsessed with mere enjoyment! And in this you reinforce the idea that relationships between men and women in the brains of the man can never be of an innocent nature? I do not agree with you because there is still something called friendship, even if you say it does not register, and i know lots of men who would treat their female friends in a completely pure manner.
    • #11
    • nidal
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 11:25:02 PM
    i hate to agree bt i think you have a point... we can't not to look at our female friends as females... when they dress nice or being cute or look sexy... bt the diffrence line is are we gonna act upon this? i dont think so... because our feelings to them will be kinda of frozen.. and if we started to have feelings to one of our female friends then she is no longer a friend...
    And by the way Sharifo, tell me, how long will it take you to get out of the cave????? it seems you need a long way to run before leaving the cave era and catching the train of civilization!
    • #14
    • Dima
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/20/2007 11:36:06 PM
    I will talk about women .. I totally agree with what you said! It's easy for women to categorise guys! And it can be easily controlled.. women might have male friends for YEARS and not even once she'd have the slightest thought that this person might be more than a friend. She just wouldn't mix between the two! If we're talking about a real friend now.. NOT a taken guy who she's forced to be friends with just because she can't go further and establish anything but friendship.

    I have male friends who i seriously consider the brothers I don't have for almost 10 years now...!
    What about a gay guy and a woman being good friends? My best friend in high school was gay.
    Sapphire,
    Maybe we should also consider the percentage of people with impotence as well!?
    I'm talking about the main stream not the less than 1% of population exceptions
    Dima,
    You have male friends that you think that they think of you as a sister. I suggest you don't put that to the test
    I don't think that wanting to sleep with a girl contradicts being friends with her. The two are not exclusive. Personally, I am more like to sleep with a girl that is a friend, than a girl who is not my friend... It goes with common sense - at least for me!
    Thanks Devil's mind you follow the "الاقربون اولى بالمعروف" thought :)

    LADIES... As we cam see in the example of Devil's mind, men might even prefer friends, I don't see that as a negative thing so don't think that I'm against it. But I'm not in support of it either. As I've said before, I'm a social observer and like to talk about these matters

    Anybody still has doubts?
    Well Said Secratea, I liked the way you put it in words

    Devil's mind, low lives like you are the ones that make all men sound so dirty, sleazy and disgusting. That crap that you just vomited you should keep to yourself. I don't understand how any sane female would ever be friends with a low life like you
    Faten, take it easy ant try not to be too personal in your responses. You may attack the point freely but not the person. At least I prefer that you stay focused on the issue instead
    Now truely guys, this is sick! This just takes us to the bottom line, "Men only see women as SEX OBJECTS." This is bad!
    Truely, if this is a generalization you are trying to make Devil's Mind, I am disapponted. I thought that men can live beyond their pens!
    • #22
    • Mazz
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/21/2007 8:18:52 AM
    i know what you're talking about. but here's the deal, no one can disregard the fact that most women are just as perverted as men. but that's not the point here, the point is that we need to stop looking at women as women and start looking at them as human beings. i'm one of the people  who are lucky enough to have a few women that are genuine friends and nothing else. sure, the thought of developing something in there might have crossed both our minds, but that doesn't mean any affirmative action was taken to endorse that thought. why? cause we know better. you got to give use heterosexual guys more credit! I'd name a few girls but then i might be breaking some hearts. and then i might be totally shattering the chance to hold a relationship there...ah, i guess there's more to what you're saying than i thought xD
    no no no, but seriously, it's a matter of brain over testosterone. just tell him to stay put, and you won't have a problem. also, not all women are THAT attractive! i mean come on, whatever happened to standards eh?
    bottom line is, some can, and some don't have the mental capacity to do so. who's to blame? doesn't matter. but the important things is that self control is the one virtue that would save lives in this matter.

    Qwaider says:"I know this does sound like "Harry met sally" cliche"
    here is the cliche he is talking about: 

    Harry: You realize of course that we can never be friends.
    Sally: Why not?
    Harry: What I'm saying is... and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form, is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
    Sally: That's not true, I have a number of men friends and there's is no sex involved.
    Harry: No you don't.
    Sally: Yes I do.
    Harry: No you don't.
    Sally: Yes I do.
    Harry: You only think you do.
    Sally: You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
    Harry: No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you.
    Sally: They do not.
    Harry: Do too.
    Sally: They do not.
    Harry: Do too.
    Sally: How do you know?
    Harry: Because no man can be friends with a woman he finds attractive, he always wants to have sex with her.
    Sally: So you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive.
    Harry: Nuh, you pretty much wanna nail'em too.
    Sally: What if they don't want to have sex with you?
    Harry: Doesn't matter, because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
    Sally: Well I guess we're not going to be friends then.
    Harry: Guess not.

    Now Qwaider, I can argue about this cliché all day long, but i won't because i agree with you when you said "women categorize men in two major buckets. Friends, and Lovers. Each having certain privileges and are expected to perform certain activities", i deal with guys the way i think its right, i can't get inside each persons head to know what is he thinking of, all i care about is as long as that person respects me, not crossing the line by any chances its ok, i don't care what factor is playing the part here (religion, matter of principle, or common sense)...

    Women are so clever , really they are … be7kelak : a women in her age has a brain of a man who is 10 years older than her .. people may think that she is so weak .. no she is not … maybe emotionally yes … and this effects her life .. but if u put emotions aside .. she can manage a7san mn 10 men .. men have many muscles in their bodies so that they can do the physical things so easily while women have many muscles in their brains so that they can think better than men .. we are equal then … w e7na mokamelen laba3adna …
    To be honest .. I totally believe that women are strong creatures and that they can run the world if only they put their emotions aside …
    One other thing: to have a friend from the opposite sex is difficult it's a risk … but there is no definition in the world says that friends are from the same sex .. nor any rule in the low says so ..plz .. let me give u these quotations to define the word" friend" :
    Frank Crane:
    What is a friend? I will tell you.
    It's a person with whom you dare to be yourself.

    Arestotal:
    What is a friend?
    A single soul dwelling in two bodies.

    Alban Goodier:
    A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone.
    So You Quaider say that you MEN are not pure and honest?? Devil's mind hits the point : this is going to turn against u gentlemen … yes yes yes … u can't see women as humans but as something else this shows that ur brains are not advanced like ours .. at least we can distinguish between men's functions but u ??? you don’t know ela one function .. ok lets say that we women decided not to contact  u unless u were their fathers, brothers, uncles and husbands .. do u think u can manage? It's ur nature man … 3'adareen .. w sada2 ele 2al : ya rjal ma elkom aman …:-) ..
    Let me but it this way : if u are looking at ur female friends just to satisfy ur needs then plz chick ur virtue …
    And plz no one takes this personal .. ana blabe neda2 elwajeb … :-)
    أنا ما قريت البوست

    بس بعد دراسة وظعك، بقدر أقلك انو.......بيع الأرظ و اتجوز لنخلص من مواظيعك

    أبوها مش طايقك؟ أحكيلك معو؟
    • #27
    • Beti
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 3/21/2007 4:25:41 PM
    Well, I guess I make up for less than 1% of the population because I actually have more male friends than female friends. Actually, before buying this flat I live in now, when I used to have roommates, they were almost always male (for practical reasons... I hate having to wait an hour and a half to be able to use the bathroom.)...
    Secratea:
    So all you got from all of this is that we think of women as sex objects? Come on now!

    Mazz:
    WOW! What a roller coaster comment, Yes, some can, most can't keep it in thier pants, and at some point it WILL pause a problem. ESPECIALLY if the lady is attractive
    But About women having similar perversions like men!!! ALLAH YKOON BI 3OONAK!

    Maioush:
    Thanks for the script, I'll spend some time beautifying it to make it look pretty and legible
    True, you can't get inside people's heads and figure out what they think of you. But sometimes it would be too obvious. Others ... well you know

    Bara2:
    I have no doubt in my mind that women are clever, and sometimes sneaky. But 10 years older (brain-wise) that's a little bit of an exaggeration. Come on! I think it's 5 until they both hit 25 then hey both grow at the same rate
    Of course growing up and maturing is optional. Growing old is not

    Let me add, Women ARE strong creatures and they DO run the world if you look closely.

    Seebek from what people think of friends, and reflect on your self. What does friend means TO YOU! (certainly not two souls dwelling in two bodies, what did they leave to lovers!)

    Bara2#2:
    Some men are pure and honest. I think it's the highest level of purity and honesty to express your hidden emotions.
    Luckily for men, Women are attracted to many other things (other than love) and no matter what MOST women will decide. Some women will still choose to sell themselves. It's the nature of the beast! So yeah, we WILL manage

    I believe, Men are purer at heart simpler, and not bound by the same set of rules as women. They will go out and ask for something if they want it. (not cause all the cosmological events in the world so that the man on the other side of the universe gets the hint and gets her what she wants), you know exactly what I'm talking about ... all women, instinctively do
    I know better than to get involved with friends. Gosh, If anything, I know so much stuff about my friends that COMPELL ME to stay the-hell away. But that might not be the case for everyone!

    Beti:
    You've obviously been around the non-creative type of men who get thier episodes of inspiration only in the bathroom :)
    But, look, your mileage will vary. A roommate is not necessarily a friend. And guess what, I am sure you HATE the fact that most of your friend (or maybe only some) look at you as just a friend. The good thing for women is that, there is always hope that he will notice.. The BAD thing for men is that, if she notices, he will lose both, the lover and the friend
    فراس ... يسعد صباحك يا رب... ايدي بزنّارك يا زلمة... ما بدنا مشاكل .. طخّ ابوها و خلّصنا
    Google Translation:
    Firas ... May happy your morning O God ... Hands up your belt Zalmeh you ... What we want problems .. Shoot cursed and concluded
    (ابوها=Cursed!!!?) How did this one even translate like that!!! LOL
    ولك انتا ضروري كان اترجم؟

    شو هاي my Hands up your belt?

    مالك؟هسع الاجانب بفهموها غلط، ولا لاحكي لابوها انك شب ظايع و صايع و بتشم كاز و سولار و يوهو
    First LOL @ Firas: inta 7ashash

    Second: I agree 100% with Mazz: not only women have perverted ideas but they also take advantage of guys pretending to be friends but have ulterior motives, this kind of guy is sooooo easy to spot and figure out.

    The way we take advantage is by getting them to do stuff for us from washing the car to teaching us how to drive to borrowing their PC for 6 months...HE HE HE women are Evil man, more evil than you think.
    وشهد شاهدٌ من اهلها
    Now can someone remind me how women are "oppressed" and what ever other junk feminists try to feed us?
    God gave some of us the muscles, and others the steering wheel... :)
    Oh lord have mercy!

    Thanks Devil's mind you follow the "الاقربون اولى بالمعروف" thought :)

    I like the way you put it... Sure, why go far when you can share precious moments with the dear ones.

    Faten: Yes I am a dirty guy... and hoping to get the dirtiest living person award... A man can only dream though!! I guess a low life girl would get along with a low life guy like me. Sad but true!!

    That is disgusting! people like you need to really get a life. And yes, you will never find a decent lady to accept you. Just trash like you said
    People like you really need to spend less time with the pigs, and more with the royalties... People like me only eat the food remains in your  royal trash, thats why I stay there... I get hungry! Thank you for your generosity your highness.
    You're welcome, There's more where that came from
    God, the nerve of some people!
    • #37
    • Riley
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 4/16/2007 10:05:19 PM
    Are you kidding me. A linear brain is better. We men can get through problems faster and easier then women. You complicate everything. And the whole "caveman" thing people today still live in caves. Osama bin laden is the world's most wanted caveman. Men and women are equal different thought processes cant change that. Women are more adapt at solving social problems then men. But men are better at technical problems. Also your conclusion undercuts everything you said. If you want to make a stand do it instead of worring about affending someone.
    Grow a backbone or you wont be able to support that swelled head of yours.
    • #38
    • Riley
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 4/16/2007 10:07:43 PM
    hey Devil's Mind and Faten, shut the hell up
    morons
    fools
    idiots
    Riley, Someone is seriously PMSing here! And you call women irrational! God .. you're so full of it
    What's wrong with a mild conclusion? Does it have to be parting of the sea level? Why can't I work on getting conflicting point of views closer? That is "problem solving for testosterone overdosed delusional males"
    • #40
    • Riley
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 4/17/2007 10:56:58 PM
    Qwaider are you out of your mind? "Part the sea level" you really won me over with that intelligent argument
    • #41
    • Riley
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 4/17/2007 11:01:11 PM
    Go ask someone with a brain what sea level means and if you e-mail me the correct answer you can have back all four of your IQ points back
    No one is trying to win you over ... What are you 9 or something! Grow up!By the way Genius, Parting of the Sea.... Level has nothing to do with SEA-LEVEL. Parting-of-the-sea, level (class) as in HUGE! Einstein would be jealous! But after all, he's the one who said, two things are Infinite "the Universe" and "human stupidity" and I'm not sure about "the universe"
    Thanks for continuing to prove Einstine was right
    • #43
    • Riley
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 4/18/2007 6:16:37 PM
    Einstein was autistic. Translation he was good at one thing and thats it. It would be unwise to take his word on everything just because he was dumb enough to build an atom bomb. I you want to quote someone make sure that it is an intelligent person. And since when did level mean huge. I look in the dictionary but thats a new one to me. Have a nice day you pathetic excuse for a member of the human race.
    LOL!! I would still take the word of an autistic BABY over your stupidity ..
    Read dumb-ass! Read... its {"Parting-of-the-sea" + "level/class"} = Huge/big/Biblical-proportion... The whole thing is one term. But morons can't really understand terms that are longer than oh .. one syllable!
    You too can have your Memories Documented

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