Take people for granted
- By: Qwaider
- On:Monday, September 11, 2006 11:50:35 AM
- In:Thoughts
- Viewed: (18338) times
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I hear this sentence a lot "Taking people for granted"... Is it really that bad?
Every now and then people recite things they hear on TV shows. Never before has this been as common. For example, the use of "So" as in "You are SO going to regret this" which is a word coined by Mathew Perry in Friends, the popular TV show, and now you just hear it everywhere.
The one I'm interested in talking about is "Taking something for granted". Often used for relationships. "Taking me for granted", "taking us for granted", "taking love for granted", "taking my friendship for granted" ... yada yada yada...
But, if you love someone, wouldn't taking them for granted actually means something positive? Doesn't it mean that you know they are going to be there through thick and thin? Doesn't it mean that you can really depend on them? Or that no matter what happens, they will be on your side, come to your aid or simply Be there!
Now, the culture of "What have you done for me lately" is prevailing to the point that it seriously making me sick. Why? because, what kind of friendship or a relationship that need to constantly go through trials and each party proving their worth over and over?
If someone loves you, why do they constantly have to prove their love (for ladies this means, bringing "things", specifically, "expensive" things). Is this the guarantee that a lady gets to make sure that her man will not leave her? Or is the mentality of cave men and women still exist in this day and age. Men must "bring" things, to get things, like ... love?
We all know what Kobe Bryant the famous NBA player did to win his wife's love when he was caught cheating on her. A big diamond ring! D'oh! Wouldn't she trade that for a simply taking him for granted and be positive that he's never going to cheat in the first place?
We take our parents for granted. They show us unconditional love, no matter what we do, no matter how bad we are, no matter how ungrateful we get. They are there for us, they're always there for us. Why can't the relationships that we venture out to strike on our own be as deep and binding as that?
My conclusion is simple, taking someone or something or someone taking you for granted is not necessarily a bad thing. It means that you're the anchor in their life, the rock that doesn't shake in the wind... The person who they can and will always depend on. So next time someone takes you for granted ... Be grateful...
Memories....
for me, it's not about proving love or friendship, it's about respecting the sincere feelings i have for others and not abuse them...
"We take our parents for granted. They show us unconditional love, no matter what we do, no matter how bad we are, no matter how ungrateful we get. They are there for us, they're always there for us" this is true, our prents are just very nice, but this doesnt mean that what we do is right... Sorry for this lengthy comment!
Sometimes it is an act of neglect, such as forgetting to tell someone how much you love and appreciate them (see Khalidah's recent post on "Love Languages").
More severe is doing something that will hurt someone because we know they will forgive us. Kobe Bryant is a good example. He cheated on his wife, knowing that she wouldn't leave him. It was great that he could trust her unconditionally, but he betrayed that trust by what he chose to do.
Let's appreciate those people who have proved trustworthy in our lives, tell them how much we appreciate them, and treat them the way they deserve: by being equally trustworthy to them.
http://www.anolitasmind.com/2006/09/11/taking-thingspeople-for-granted
http://www.anolitasmind.com/2006/09/11/taking-thingspeople-for-granted/
And yes, many words/phrases have been bottled according to the media/Hollywood style.
According to you ;Taking someone/something for granted means , believing that no matter what /where/ when , they/it will be always there . Of course , there is nothing for eternity .. but with some people , we would like to believe there is eternity when it comes to the relation we share with them.
I'd take parents for example , we do take their unconditional love and care for granted , that's true , but we also should appreciate them , and acknowledge the value of their presence , for the simple fact that , one day they may no longer be with us .. and it might be too late to reciprocate to the love they have given to us.
a. to accept without question or objection; assume
b. to use, accept, or treat in a careless or indifferent manner
If a is what the person meant, the said person is considered assuming. If he says, "I'm taking you for granted." That's when it's good since the said person is accepting the other person as a whole. [True friendship. Whoot.] This can be expressly said or implied. Either way, it works. :D
As for b, that's when it becomes bad. You treat others as if they're mere objects you use just to make it through. That's just plain evil and insensitive of the person. This one is usually implied. You're called a "user" if you do this.
In my opinion, this idiom has this negative connotation. Letter b is more used. So, I believe that people will just take this negatively once said...
So there.