Blogging from Chicago

Anticipating the heightened security measures in airports, I decided to arrive 4 hours early. Pretty smart huh? Guss what, I'm not the only smart person out there, EVERYONE was there 3 or 4 hours earlier!

So I go to the long line, only to be told that no, that's not the beginning of the line, and that the line actually begins on the other side of the lobby! I was shocked! That was one hell of a long line

Anyway, I went to they line, and an hour later, sure enough I showed up at the E-Ticketing counter. I was so happy, and therefore, the machine decided to give me a nice little : Contact an Agent message, so what do I do? I contacted an agent. Which told me to contact another agent. When directed me to lift the little phone next to the E-ticketing device and call the help center

So I do, and what does the help center say? TALK TO THE AGENT!

At this point I was already upset, my "smart" scheme to arrive there early has failed and I had no choice but to ask the agent "super gently" because these people are jumpy and I don't want any more trouble! So she point to me to the end of another line and asks me to go there. I was once again raging with anger, and I was like, why did you tell me to talk to the agent, and then to the other agent then?

The passenger next to me told me the flight was cancelled and at that stage, I was like Tom from Tom & Jerry where the top of his head would explode and steam would come out from his ears head and nose. With a big Train "Tooooooot" sound.

Anyway, I swallowed my pride and went and stood in the other VERY long and much slower line!

An Hour and a half later, I got to the counter. The lady looked at my stuff, punched few keys, and then said sorry I have to call this in. I was like.... what's wrong? She said, there's a security match on you! I was like .... WHAT!!!? This is the first time this happens .... EVER! (must have recently said something bad!)

Anyway, it wasn't all that bad, just few millions clicks later and I was happy with a boarding pass. Huh? That thing doesn't look like a boarding pass. So I exclaimed. She looks at me and says, Sorry sir, I can't do seat assignment for you, you have to do it at the gate [probably thinking, IF YOU MAKE IT to the gate and not get arrested!]

I thanked her, and looked at the first agent, thanked her too. And now she was much nicer. I said, everything is fine, my flight wasn't cancelled and everything is going to be alright!

I went through security, shoes off, belt off, hmm coming to think about it, I didn't take my watch off, it weighs a TON! interesting.

Anyway, went to the gate, stood in yet another line for people getting the seat assignments. Gave him the thing that looked like a boarding pass and he said, I'll call you.

At this stage, I said screw it. I'm going to go have some lunch. So I walk to the nearby Burger King and ordered some yummy comfort junk food

I went back and apparently he's been calling my name for a while! I was laughing at this point ... thinking, your turn United!

So I go grab my ticket, and it's a wonderful isle seat ... PERFECT!

And the rest was all good, with the exception of the stupid pilot swerving from one side of the runway to the other and pushing break way too often!

Got lost getting out of the goddamn airport onto the stupid toll ways that they have here (We have no Toll ways in Washington state) anyway, 2 hours later, I arrive at the hotel, after making a little detour to White Castle for some of the BEST BURGERS ON EARTH!