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« JordanBlogs, GirlyGator <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">down until further notice</span> FIXEDIf you can read this, then your computer is at risk »

Do you think I'm a bully?

  • By: Qwaider

  • On:Wednesday, December 03, 2008 11:03:50 PM
  • In:Thoughts
  • Viewed: (6545) times

    • Currently 4.3/5 Stars.
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    Rated 4.3/5 stars (130 votes cast) Thanks for your vote!

    I'm really surprised at the reactions of some people. My spidey senses tells me that people think I'm a bully. Many fear that I will use my sites to either attack someone, or retaliate against them.

    I don't know what I've done to deserve that. But at the same time, I have no idea what to do to convince people that I'm not that kind of a person. Let's set one thing straight, people, no matter how much you think you have figured me out, YOU DON'T KNOW ME! So please stop judging ME with your own scale of insecurities.

    If I disagree with your idea, this doesn't mean that I will attack you! I will attack the IDEA. I am entitled just like anyone else to like or hate your idea. Why does that make some people insecure?

    I view my work with the online communities as a community service. I am doing my part as a citizen of this community to HELP the community. I'm a servant of this community and not it's master!

    I know this is getting straight to the people who have doubts about it because if there is one thing I learned it is this. Your friends might read your blog frequently, but your enemies are reading it ALL THE TIME, and they will not let a single word slip.

    Folks, look. I have been attacked PERSONALLY by Moey, By Arab Observer, by NAS and others through other means (comments, emails, IM ..etc). Some mentioned my name specifically, some preferred not to. But I'm not the one who would answer a personal attack with another personal attack.

    I will shred your stupid, racist, narrow minded or profane thought to pieces and make a fool out of you for thinking it. And I will do it using my name. Unless, I'm really practicing restrain and not in the mood to argue, yet again, fruitlessly.

    And again, I am trying to serve this community in one capacity. But that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to think and express my disagreement with anyone. Or that I'm a neutral bystander! But I WILL NEVER EVER DENY SOMEONE OF THEIR RIGHT IN THIS COMMUNITY BECAUSE I AM THE ONE PROVIDING SERVICES FOR IT

    DO YOU GET THAT?

    I'm NOT another corrupt Arab official, and I'm NOT seeking any privileges nor am I the kind of person who will abuse his position.

    Other Memories Documented on December 03
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    • #1
    • mab3oos
    • Ubuntu OS Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/3/2008 11:28:12 PM
    • SpamScore=[-0.32]

    a bully???!! Thats a first.

    I have never met, but I have always thought you would be just like Kalimoro!

    • #2
    • whisper
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/3/2008 11:39:06 PM
    • SpamScore=[0.47]

    what i really like about blogging that u don't deal directly with people,u can write whatever comes to your mind and don't feel shy if it's something stupid or wrong...no body will gas u and give the look u don't want to see

    because what u write or what the people writes and u want to comment on it is an idea u want people to read and get benefit from it....maybe just for fun .
    and you will wait to see the comments...regular people will take it as an open discussion to know what is right and what is wrong....sick people will take it as a fight

    for me i know u as a name for a blog i really like to start my day reading what's new there

    for sure there is things i don't agree with u 100% about it, but i still like it , some times love it :)

    soooo man keep it up and go on because u r the best,and u did serve this community really u did, u create a planet where every one can say whatever and whenever he want

    so thanks Qwaider

    • #3
    • Hani Obaid
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 12:57:41 AM
    • SpamScore=[-5.18]
    for one thing moey, nas, and Fadi are all still on QP. So no you're not using your sites to get back at those who criticizing you. In fact I actually prefer the approach of using someones name to criticize as opposed to writing anonymously. From what I've seen you're usually polite even when you criticize or strongly disagree.

    Lol mab3oos, I didn't even remember kalimero was the bata al-soda!  Is that where the term came from ?
    • #4
    • Sabeur
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 1:26:29 AM
    • SpamScore=[-0.1]
    Qwaider your doing an amazing service with Qwaider planet and I admire that. there is no such thing as cyberbullying, just dumb twats who don't know where the X (big red one)is.  

    Keep it up, waiting for new projects
    • #5
    • KJ
    • Windows Chrome  Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 8:27:26 AM
    • SpamScore=[-0.25]
    It's not that you're a bully, but if you remember by long "two cents" comment, people tend to take sides in an argument and it's usually against you.

    Those days are over. People may still hold grudges, it's up to you whether or not you want to close unresolved conflicts.

    But just like you commented on Mai's post, you're just letting them get to you.
    • #6
    • kinzi
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 8:27:50 AM
    • SpamScore=[-1.38]
    QWaider, you founded QP, but your success with it is a sign of being nominated, elected and re-elected as 'Mayor' by the folks in the 'sphere'.

    Ditto Hani. I'd much rather have you 'shred' me openly with a differing opinion than the anon trolls who come and attack personally leaving a fake email address. I've never felt 'shredded', btw. Irritated a couple times, but I know I do my share of irritating too! :)

    Part of what makes it fun is that we are all a bunch of strong-willed people with our own opinions. We clash, we get over it, we still bring our toys and play. As far as I know, NO ONE has ever taken it a physical fight into the off-line world or even hacked into another site maliciously, which is quite something!
    • #7
    • Nizar
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 9:49:08 AM
    • SpamScore=[-0.45]
    Attacking an idea is not wrong, but attacking an idea ignorantly just to avoid accepting defeat is wrong!

    It's good to hear that you are being fair, and the existence of the people that disagree with you on QP proves that you are fair.

    Thanks for the wonderful community.

    P.S. Lol @ mab3oos
    You're not a bully, Qwaider!
    • #9
    • marwa
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 3:10:52 PM
    • SpamScore=[0.45]
    im 100% sure that u believe in yr self and know exactly what u r doing .. u founded the QP which is a great forum for all of us 2 share our ideas, thoughts , and life experiences .. just keep it up and thx 4 everything w27san 7al hoo enak "e6nesh"
    u rock :)
    • #10
    • Qwaider
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 5:06:22 PM
    • SpamScore=[-46.31]
    Mabsoot
    Thanks, but I never thought I was "Batta soda":)

    Whisper
    Thanks for the kind words, I'm not sure I deserve all of them. But, I'm grateful nonetheless for them. Thanks again

    Hani
    Absolutely, I wouldn't do that.

    Sabeur
    Thanks man, there will be more great projects in the future :) Stay tuned

    KJ
    And holding grudges is the mature thing to do, right? I don't know. I don't hold grudges, and I don't retaliate in that fashion. Taking sides is fine by me. Defending your ideas is fine. But attacking someone in a post dedicated to attacking them. Or worrying that I'm going to bully people around! I'm NOT A BABY like that!

    Kinzi
    Yes Kinzi, you haven't been shredded because. You didn't try to be racist or promote foul language and conduct as "the thing". But you were still on the receiving end of a ton of criticism for many things. Some was constructive I'm sure, and some changed your mind about things and people.
    (No one) :) hmmm .. That's going to happen sooner or later :)

    Nizar
    True, attacking something just for the sake of it, is ignorant, childish and stupid. And ultimately will cause the counter argument to be shredded to pieces :)

    Yazan
    Thanks Man, I really appreciate those words

    Marwa
    Thanks. Yeah, Tannish :). But these ideas and views people propagate aren't leaving me alone. That's the problem.
    Thanks again
    • #11
    • KJ
    • Windows Chrome  Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 8:28:22 PM
    • SpamScore=[0.34]
    I understand it's difficult for you to overlook their attacks. When they do attack, count to ten before you comment back. I am sure they actually do not have any solid evidence of you bullying them. An instance of perceived bullying brought up from a conflict of opinions is immature on their part.

    A dear friend of mine (who is a fellow blogger) and I were discussing a similar issue that arose recently on the Syrian blogs. An argument between some people triggered an all-out war because of opinions conflicting. It's immature and laughable if you look at it as an outsider.

    Conflict between people generally arises when any of the two parties do not attempt to understand the thoughts and beliefs of the other person that lead to rise of the different opinions. Take Hani for instance. He's an atheist and vocal about it, and people attack him. But if you look at his history (which he wonderfully portrayed) you'd understand how he thinks and his thought system. There's absolutely nothing wrong with him or anyone else. It's simply our belief that "we are always right" that makes other people wrong.

    Am not directing this to you Samer, am directing this to your attackers.

    Your conflicts with people I believe mostly involve something to do with homosexuality, what women/men should and should not do, as well as criticizing aspects of Jordanian (or general Arab) society as well other aspects that affect us all in ways we don't always perceive (ie web and browser security and anonymity in general).

    If I am not KJ and just another dope who passes here I'd say you're ma3tooh. But I know that security is your field and it is your concern, and you're bringing forth the issues for us to be aware of it. As a Jordanian, you are also entitled to speak of your culture and what you believe is affecting its progress.

    What people fail to understand that criticism comes from two things: hate (which is just plain baseless bashing) or love, which comes from a thorough observation + your beliefs/thoughts/ideas/thinking system + a formulated opinion serving as an attempt to address a situation.

    Even if someone else's opinion is flat-out wrong by most mortal standards, it should be dealt with with respect. Afterall - it's just an opinion.
    • #12
    • Maioush
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 9:01:08 PM
    • SpamScore=[-2.32]
    see baby, you keep on telling me that people do stupid things just to get mad, and by doing that I’m allowing them to get into me, and you are giving these people too much attention, way more than they actually deserve.
    You are not a bully, you are just honest and straight forward, ma 3endak laf o dawaran, you say out loud what a lot of cowards think in their heads, but ofcourse they would never dare say it in people's face, so they go as anonymous
    wala yhemak, when any of these people who attacks pay eshi mn jeebet aboohom 3ala elli bte3malo ba3dean yefta7o temhom!
    • #13
    • hijabee
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 9:32:51 PM
    • SpamScore=[1]
    Woow I did not know speaking your mind could be this complicated...
    • #14
    • vagueraz
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/4/2008 11:35:42 PM
    • SpamScore=[0.23]
    ,,,

    do not pay attention for those who attacks you ,,
    You know ur self ad you speak your mind , and this is your view point ,,,

    no mattar what they  said ,,,
    You are not bully ,,,,,,
    keep posting the way you want ,no one have right to judge you throught your posts ,,,,,...

    mm, HappY EID to YOU & maIoush w yn3aad 3aleekum b el se7a w el salameh :D
    • #15
    • kinzi
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2008 6:45:40 PM
    • SpamScore=[-1.4]
    Hey, Qwaider, I'm in trouble again over that Mona/Racism post. Can you help me out? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
    You too can have your Memories Documented

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