My first crush...
The highlight of my uneventful lunch has been an interesting conversation with two lady-colleagues that were in a heated discussion over first crushes. I was trying to stay out of it until... One lady turned to me and asked, "Sam, did you ever get over your first crush?"
I actually got stomped for a moment there, not because I didn't know the answer, but for a completely different reason!
Lets go back few moments in time before that explosive question got thrown in my face.
The whole discussion started, when one lady complained how she was going over her old notes in shoe box she had in her attic and how she remembered her first crush on this boy that she was never able to forget. Mind you, she's lived a very full life and getting married next July.
The other lady was arguing that she hates her first crush and everyone should do the same "if they had any self respect" since this is the "decent way it should be". (And I quote). At the very least, all romantic feelings should be left in the past. With nothing but friendship remaining. If even that!
The first lady was upset by that use of words, and proceeded to explain how innocent the first love and first crush must be, and how it lingers forever. While the second lady tried to reason how inappropriate it is to everyone you know to maintain this romantic connection.
Then both looked at me with that question, each trying to democratically win the moral argument based on the popularity of her idea.
What really got me stomped that I actually fished in my mined for a good 30 seconds while I tried to remember who was my first crush. For some reason, I had no recollection of who she was, or how did her face look like, I drew a complete blank! The person I spent nights writing poetry for, doesn't even have a face in my mind!
What really got me to think even more was the fact that I could only remember one thing, how everything in my life is being defined by a new priority, my family, my wife. How everything evolved to rotate around these concepts and nothing else, nothing before that exists.
What I realized at that moment is that, people who never get over their first crushes, have yet to meet the person who's going to be their romantic "big bang". With absolutely no trace of anything before them. Just the present, and everything that took place after that major event...
So if you still remember your first crush, or have feelings for them. You still haven't met the right person ... I do realize that this is such a massive generalization, but at the same time, let it be a reminder that we owe our feelings to our families, to the person we're bounded to. Not some figment of our imagination ... Who probably forgot we even exist!