Making people happy

By: Qwaider

On:Saturday, June 28, 2008 11:38:55 AM
In:Thoughts
Viewed: (4486) times

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Is a total myth, no one can take responsibility or a commitment on making someone else happy. EVEN If they wanted to. Although, happiness in my book is a transient state, it's not the "ever after" kind. But we tend to oscillate between happiness and misery from time to time, but most of the time, we hover around the gray neutral zone.

But, it's really troubling when you start thinking that there are people who depend on you as a source of happiness, and consequently, blame you in the case of their misery.

See, the way they're said is "Your happiness", and "Your sadness". They're yours, you need to own up to them. You're responsible for them. You have well within you the capabilities to turn one to the other. It's all a matter of perception!

That's why making people happy is an unattainable goal. That's why no one will ever succeed at that. Even people who come close to success are the ones who decided consciously to accept their reality.

It's weird how people blame people for their sadness, it's even weirder (but most people don't consider it) how people attribute their happiness to someone else's actions. Take the simple example of a guy bringing his lady some flowers. If she was of the kind usually known as appreciative and nice, she will find it amazing, wonderful. But if she wasn't she'll probably find it below her, or even insulting! The intentions of the guy are totally irrelevant.

It's our own perspective that counts. It's our own interpretation that counts. It's about time we looked more at our selves and blamed or congratulated them for our current situation.

I'm not saying take it all out on your self. What I'm trying to say is focus on the areas that you like, and improve more on them. Focus on the areas where you're not doing very well, and improve them. Turn them around, or at least, learn to receive them in a positive way. After all, it was your own wrong doing...

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Memories....

#1
KJ
Said
On: 6/28/2008 5:21:16 PM

Talking about perception isn't easy - Yes you can attempt to perceive the situation as upsetting or not and take it easy and remain happy. But with all honesty, you can't help but be upset when someone is around or happy often... it is either these people carry a large amount of negative/positive vibe, or the stuff they do!

But yeah depending on someone else totally as a source of happiness/misery is a bit too extreme

#2
Hani Obaid
Said
On: 6/30/2008 12:00:06 AM

Assuming we don't lack the basics (food, shelter etc..), then we each decide what will make us happy. I think most miserable people want to be miserable.

There's an old Arabic saying (don't extend your feet beyond your comforter!). If only we don't wish for the things we can never have, we'd all be a little happier.

#3
Qwaider
Said
On: 6/30/2008 8:54:53 PM

Kj
No it's not
But people who are always beaming with positivity are not that annoying. Well, not as annoying as a moving black hole
As for depending on others as a source of happiness, trust me, many people fall into that trap and the disappointment is so great it might cause them to slip into severe depression

Hani
True, but there are people who are miserable because they think a lot!
LOL! that's a good saying! :) Another face for
القناعة كنز لا يفنى و لا يستحدث من العدم و لكن يتحول من صورة الى صورة اخرى