Perspectives, on Middle Eastern marriage

So I stated one view. The demeaning aspect of parading brides in front of future mother in laws or grooms.

However, there's another aspect; here you have a family, woman and marriage age son, approaching a family in marriage and the two don't even know each other yet. It's not like the woman need to prove her worth, show her love, pitch in or do anything special to get people proposing to her.

This accounts to an immense amount of respect for the woman. Her self worth is intact. She can, provided that she has an understanding family, pick and choose of serious men, proposing life long commitment without even knowing her. Now how much "worthy" can you feel beyond that?

There are may perspectives to the same half-full-half-empty cup, but these are the major two.

The interesting part is that there are a number of rituals that are associated with the practice. For example, the woman is "sized up" to avoid any compatibility issues, the same happens to the groom. The family of the perspective future wife does their home work. Sort of like a background check which can include the family's social and even medical history to ensure their daughter is not going to end up with someone from a family with history of say, violence towards their wives, or hereditary issues.

All these "checks" serve to narrow the gap between the two. If the lady is really "not his type" or he's "not up to par" the two are spared the embarrassment and the whole thing is off

It's painful on the two parties, to see their parents interfere in such decisions in their lives. It's exactly the same way a 7 year old feels when his mommy cheers for him in a soccer match. But the 7 year old doesn't know any better, similarly, most men and women don't know what's in store for them.

Surprisingly, these precisely calculated marriage have such a whopping success rate that no one can argue their value. Despite the lack of romance. You'll often meet ladies who boast that they have "never met or talked to him before they were engaged", yet he insisted and persevered and managed to be the only one she accepted.

The pain and pressure doesn't stop at the bride and the groom. Their parents suffer on a daily bases from people who appears to be tipping total strangers to the where abouts of hidden treasures.

Mothers of grooms are bombarded by news of suitable brides here and there. Families of potential brides are also frequently called, or visited by intermediaries, or mothers of grooms who have been pushed to go check them out since they have "nothing to lose"

It all feels like there are people who have taken the job of getting as many people married as possible. As if it was a race of some sort. Many of them will not take NO for an answer and some will continue even AFTER people have their minds set on someone.

There are many ways to look at this matter, and there are very negative perspectives of it. There are a good number of positive perspectives. People are going to continue to be divided between the two. I don't think such rituals are going to go anywhere anytime soon as they managed to find their ways to the upper classes of the society, and appear to have held their own against the changing times.