The hardest thing
- By: Deemco
- On:Tuesday, February 12, 2008 4:26:22 PM
- In:Thoughts
- Viewed: (6476) times
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In exactly 6 months, I'll be getting married. I'm excited and looking forward to it, but there's just one thing that's constantly on my mind. I just can't absorb the fact that I'll no longer wake up and see my family everyday. To be specific, my mom and dad. No actually, it's my whole family. I'm really attached to them, especially my brother and sister. If a day passes by where I don't see one of them, I feel like something is missing.
What makes it even harder is that when I get married, my fiance and I are gonna live in the U.S. for the first few months. Not to mention that we're gonna spend Ramadan on our own. I'm just not used to being so far away from my family. It hasn't even happened yet and the mere thought makes me upset and feel depressed.
I can't imagine not being able to kiss my little brother every day, or sneak up on him while he's playing on his PlayStation and steal a kiss or a hug. I'm gonna miss his annoying little questions that he keeps asking me.
It's gonna be hard not having my sister with me to talk to and share my thoughts with, or hearing her crazy stories. I'm sure she's gonna have lots going on when I get married because she'll be starting university. I'm gonna miss staying up late with her watching movies, pigging-out on chocolate and fatty snacks. I'm definitely gonna miss the crazy things that she does and the way she makes me laugh. My sister really is one of a kind, even more, she's my best friend.
Most of all, I'm going to miss my mom. If I ever need anything or have any questions (whether it's something major about life, or as simple as what to do about my stomach ache) she's the one I go to. I'm gonna miss standing with her in the kitchen, trying to learn how to cook, I'm gonna miss the crazy way that she drives, and how she would wake me up in the morning just to have breakfast with her. Simply put, I'm gonna miss the quality time that we spend together.
As for my dad, we share a normal father-daughter relationship. He's the typical Arab father who doesn't express much emotions (except for anger), but lately he's not hiding them very well. He's sad that I'm getting married and I can tell. For the past few months he's been throwing comments here and there like: "wallah ya deemco, bokrah btitjawazi o btitrekena", "mish ader atkhayal ilbait bedoonik" and "mish 7ilo ilbait bedoonik". He may have a hard exterior, but I know he's soft on the inside.
My family isn't perfect, but they mean the world to me. With each passing day, as I get closer to my wedding day, I grow more and more attached to them. I've learned that family comes first, because in the end, they're all you've got. All I can do now is make the best of these 6 months and appreciate what I have while I still have it.
Memories....
LOL!
You're getting married, you're not going to die ... you'll still be there :) You'll visit, they'll visit ..
You will be fine, and they will be happy to get rid of you!
Your Husband,
Abu staif
Ashco: I'm sure you will :)
There's a difference between being ALONE and being with someone who loves you and takes care of you like Ashco.. You're going to be fine :)
They'll come and visit, you'll go and visit. It's not like you're going to be totally alone .. sa7?
Best wishes and good luck :D
Maioush: Thanks a lot, I appreciate the support :)
About keeping in touch with your family long distance Deemco, I recommend voice over IP (VOIP). Not skype and iphone and that junk. You can buy a linksys VOIP enabled Vonage router, and get a subscription with Vonage (for $15/month). What it gives you is the ability to make unlimited calls to any number in the US and Canada (including cell phones). You can call any number, not just other vonage numbers. If you get one vonage router for you in the US, and another for your family in Amman, you'll be able to stay on the phone with them for as long as you want, and you'll never pay more than that $15 per month. As an added bonus, your family will also be able to call anyone in the us for free with their vonage router (like Qwaider). The cool part is you don't need a pc to use it, you can hook up any phone to the vonage router (I just use a cordless phone), and use all it's features including caller ID. My sister spends hours on the phone with my mom on this thing. As long as your internet conneciton is 1 Mbit or faster, it's crystal clear.
Yalla tomorrow you'll have your own family, and your mom will help. Some people say no matter how old you get, you're still a little kid to your parents until you have your own kids ! I kinda like that definition because it means I'm staying a little kid forever :)
Good point though
You can use Broadvoice, 9.99 flat .. excellent deal
don't worry bannout bukra biseer 3andek ur own family and u will get busy with ur own little circle, the missing part will stay there (i c my sister feeling homesick every once in a while) but it will take a different shape/size.
mabrook in advance damdoum and all the best :)
when my friends first got married they cried their eyes out everynight wanting to go back to their houses and sleep in their beds, but now when they go visit their parents house it doesnt feel like home anymore, their home is where their husbands and their children are.. they made their own homes..
So it is going to be hard at first and after twenty something years of living with your family its not easy not seeing them everyday and I think the feeling that you are hundreds of miles away does not help.
Your spouse will not fill the place of your family (sorry :)) but he is your family too and together you will have your own little family..
Good luck...
Simply me: Thanks sweetie, I'll keep that in mind. I'm definitely preparing myself for the move so that it doesn't come as a shock to me. I try not to let it get to me, but it's hard sometimes. I'm sure I'll adapt, but change is never easy.
ProudPali: I guess u're the kind of person who feels happier independent and on her own and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm glad u're happy and Allah ybarik feeki :)
Princess N: I'm definitely gonna miss my sister. It's always hard when sisters no longer live together, especially if they're close. Hopefully my sister won't be too sad since she plans on going to study abroad right after I get married. I feel bad for my parents because if she does, then the house is gonna be empty. They'll only have my little brother there. My older brother already lives in the states, now 2 more of us are moving out. It's gonna get lonely for them.
LOOOOOOOOOOL
I was like WTF @ "father-daughter relationship"... umm.. OK Qu!
But then it kicked in and I was like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
I know what the feeling is like, not because I am getting married, but because I have been living without my family since 17. I have struggled through these years using my wits, my friends' help, and the telephone calls with my parents.
It is tough when you first leave them, but marriage is a whole new level, and your hubby - while not filling in the role of your parents - will definitely be there to share with you new moments and experience with you the old memories.
Wow, since 17?? That must have been tough, but I believe that it makes u into a stronger person and really helps in building ur character.