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« Another garbage victim!Where I would rather be tomorrow »

Sex education is inevitable!

  • By: Qwaider

  • On:Wednesday, December 05, 2007 2:21:24 AM
  • In:Thoughts
  • Viewed: (14682) times

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    Rated 4.5/5 stars (98 votes cast)

    Arabs have been thrusting their head in the sand for far too long. While incidents like the dumpster babies, honor crimes are raising some serious questions regarding our educational systems and the way it is neglecting pressing issues of the world in the 21st century. Which leads me to believe that Sex education needs to be mandatory and instated in every school for young teens to understand how to deal with it, how to handle it, how to protect themselves, and what to do if the worst was to happen.

    Someone needs to put an end to superstition and make sure that our youth are not an easy victim to ignorance.

    Dos and donts

    Before someone jumps off the boat to tell me that this in Un-islamic and doesn't comply with our traditions. Allow me to say few things here.

    Islam as a religion, is one of the most liberal and upfront in the way it handles issues of sex, dealing/taming/regulating/curbing human desires away from taboos and social imposed crap (aka traditions). In fact, Islam made sure that both male and female understand their RIGHTS and OBLIGATIONS in a relationship. Making it clear helps people fulfil their human desires in compliance with the Islamic Shariah if you're a person of faith, and if you're not then it would be in accordance with common sense and social norms (although I'm sure someone is going to contest this)

    The lack of sex education in our schools and our life, have left our youth a fertile ground for superstition, fear, wrong values, wrong ideas, wrong actions in the face of such strong sources of influence like, peers, Internet, satellite TV stations and bootlegged-DVDs.

    No one can deny the important role the parents, and environment play in these cases. But there is a limit to what they can do without the backing of the second most important institution in the life of a person. The School!

    Instead of allowing everyone in the world to influence and ruin a person's sexual life from it's infancy, why not allow the system to resolve this issue by introducing an educational curriculum that is supervised by specialists, child psychologists and even religious scholars to make sure that the whole system is geared towards successfully delivering the message. Allowing the new generation to grow empowered with knowledge, and have it done in accordance with our religious and cultural obligations

    There's no doubt that this is a hard step. People aren't very accepting to the idea that their DAUGHTERS would know about these things on the fear that knowledge might inflame the girl's desires to explore. Couldn't the same happen simply by watching TV, talking to a friend or simply opening one of those booby-trapped emails?

    And even if that is true, isn't it better to introduce abstinence based on self respect, self control and knowledge rather than ignorance and "not having the chance"

    In computers we have a term called security by obscurity. A form of false security that is based on the fact that people do not know something therefore they don't attack it. But kids these days are far smarter than that. They will figure it out, and they might end up attempting a thing or two. Considering it, hacking life! Kids these days are obsessed with hacking-stuff!

    By the way, I said daughters deliberately, because in this society, [fill in your favorite female vulnerability sexist reason]

    It's time for us to meet the challenges of the 21st century. Walls, and bars can no longer detain or protect. Our only power and our last shield is knowledge! Even India and China have started thier own sex education programs to make sure thy stop social problems before they happen. In two countries who have been traditionally very conservative.

    I think it's time for the whole Arab world to wake up

    Other Memories Documented on December 05
    « Another garbage victim!Where I would rather be tomorrow »

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    • #1
    • أنونيموس
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2007 3:27:48 AM
    You have said it all. Just because your kids aren't learning it from you or from school now doesn't mean they're not learning it the wrong way somewhere else.
    Becoming educated does not mean that the knowledge will be abused; if instructed properly it would actually be beneficial judging by today's trends.
    • #2
    • masalha1
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2007 7:23:36 AM
    Qwaider,
    Sex-ed is a sensetive issue in this part of the world, although we are not as conservative as we want to believe we are, (I have seen loose girls and boys more than you would see in western world), we have become an open society to an extent, yet we don't want to tackle this issue, its a TABOO, there are married women who don't know what orgasm is, so how do you expect those women to teach their daughters about sex? so teaching kids at the age of 16 to 17 about this may not be a horrible thought long as its done in a manner that doesn't promote the idea of having sex, and done by specialists of the same gender, with a focuss on the consequences of such acts, such as sexual transmitted diseases or pregnancy, or even social consequences, and maybe some years down the road those MOMs and DADs will be able to teach their own children about birds and beans.
    I second your opinion. having this program doesn't mean that schools will have condoms and pills distributed to kids. we should come out of our bubble of a conservative society, we are not any more.
    there will always be kids who do it, but maybe with sex-ed they will... i don't know.. just have less damage or sth.
    • #4
    • sam
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2007 8:56:24 AM
    this is exactly what i thougth when i read your post yesterday...there is an abvious problem and we have to face it... my parents were shocked about sex ed we had at school, they said what kind of a culture is this encouraging kids to have sex...well it is not like they are telling kids go ahead and engage in sex, but education is a valuable tool...most kids would not know about STD and how easy it is to get pregnant..and girls need to learn that guys will not explode and die if they do not have sex in the near future..i wonder if guys still used that ..hahaha...kids talk about these things, a friend of mine said that her 6yo's friend told her things about sex! now that is so early to talk about sex, but kids these days are exposed to alot more ...where would u rather your kids learn about these things, from an ignorant friend or from a proffessional who will give u all the facts...in ziad's school they started teaching kids about their bodies in KG  last year...they taugt them about their bodies and about unapropriate  touching..since is also a problem that alot of children face in all part of the world...there are too  many sickos out there...sadly
    I don't think it is education. Remember Rabab and her Boyfriend, Basem? they were the hottest couple around. well, until 3ammi Mansour El najjar pulled a catholic preist stunt on them! I think it is more cultural, which is rooted deep into the.... khalas grifit..
    I cannot agree with you more on this one! I used to preach this all the time, but did not recognize the severity of the problem until recently, I was talking to a young married lady that was having intimacy problems with her husband, and after a long talk the reason was that she was molested as young girl, the problem is she did not know what was happening to her and that that was not normal ! If she and a lot of others knew anything about their bodies and sex, she would not be facing this huge problem now.

    Besides, boys and girls will become curious and search for answers if we liked it or not, and more often than not they will find twisted bits and peaces of reality
    it's not 3eeb bas ya3ny takhayyal those elly will go to "try" out & put in action what they learn in theory hehehe! it's not about education bel madares, it's about moms & dads talking to their children about it :)
    • #8
    • sam
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2007 9:06:47 PM
    well sex education does not mean that you learn how to kiss and make out..they do not show you a couple making out so you know how to do it...it is all about awarness of how our bodies work, the risk of having sex left and right...how to not get pregnant and get STD's if you are stupid enough to engage in premarital sex when you are still a child..

    wow tamara that is so sad what your friend went through..this is why im glad that this is taught early in school in canada...kids should know what is appropriate and what is not...of course all this is taught by a child pycholgist who knows what she is talking about..
    • #9
    • afaf
    • Windows Internet Explorer
    • Said
    • On: 12/5/2007 9:24:58 PM
    today, at barnes and nobles, i saw a book titled "where do babies come from" at the kid's section, and i kinda like it, though pictures r somehow bald, but as hubby says, i am the one who is shy and doesnot explain it, when my son asks me...but he said "better learn it at home the right way instead of learnign it from friends the wrong way!!"! i agree totally, and maybe i will go and buy the book after all and keep it till he is old enough to know it...keep in mind, they r exposed to human body all sort of books and questions r always arise!!!
    انونيموس
    Thanks.

    Msalaha1
    It is a very sensitive issue, I completely agree with you. Yet it's needed. We must find a way to allow this information to reach our youth to empower them.

    Wonders
    I agree with you. less damage is always better

    Sam,
    Your exposure to other cultures makes you understand how this is relevant and is arguably the best solution. Education!

    Garfan (aka has something up his)
    Who's Rabab and Basem? I've been away from home for too long and I think I have missed out on this story.

    Tamara
    I'm glad you shared that story with us. You see, many people think that it's going to come to people naturally. We'll know what right and what's wrong and whatever! But the fact is, we really don't and sometimes we need coaching

    Chikapappi
    Why do we automatically assume that they will go ahead and just try everything? Did you try all the science experiments you had in your science book (I did :))

    Sam#2
    Absolutely, awareness, education, defense these are very important aspects of the whole matter.

    Afaf
    Yes, absolutely. I think your husband has a very good point there too
    I very much agree, couldn’t have said it better. It’s a very sensitive subject indeed, and no matter how educated and open minded our parents are/were they always have issues when it comes to explaining this!

    I look back to my own experience and say thanks God I ended up being a normal person (well, I hope :D) cause info about this subject were NIL at home! Some friends volunteered to give me some information though, and of course they weren’t a good or reliable source.

    i remember our families used to warn us from talking to strangers, taking the lift with a stranger and things of that sort…but they never explained things to us clearly...

    I think our generation should start changing things..
    Before discussing whether sex education should be introduced, we better fix our existing disastrous educational system in the Arab countries which is basically depending on stuffing the kids’ brains with nonsense that would be forgotten after the exams….
    In UAE, we look forward to witnessing the kind of improvements to be undertaken after changing the management & announcing the strategic vision of his highness Mohammad Bin Rashid…

    99.9 % of the families in the region will shoot you in the head if they hear ur valuable suggestion! Lik in Bahrain & Kuwait  they still protest & turn the Parliament up side down whenever there is a concert 4 Nancy or Elissa. So what sex education are u talking about….
    It's not optional Arab Lady .. WE WILL have to do it one day or another. It will happen eventually.

    As for the educational system. I don't really agree with you on that. I still remember my school taught classes more than 12 years after I graduated Tawjihi. But I guess it depends on the student more.

    Our students (and I taught a few over here) are WAAAAYA better than American kids in colleges and Universities.
    With that said, I do believe there is room for improvement.
    • #14
    • psg
    • Windows Firefox Browser
    • Said
    • On: 12/7/2007 2:37:31 PM
    i agree with u 100%..
    another thing: "social imposed crap (aka traditions)." LOL !!!!!
    Oh yea, I am ALL for sex ed. Because kids are getting it anyway, from friends usually for girls and porn for guys (yes, guys would distribute porn CDs to each other in school, and offered some to girls as well, it was SICK). My parents actually were very insistent that any Q's we had to come talk to them and not to other ppl
    We weren't allowed in the sex-ed classes in school (because they were promoting safe sex, and not just sex ed) but my parents did provide us with age-appropriate books and conversations if need be (me the bookworm never needed conversations but im pretty sure my sis had tons of conv wit my mom about this!)
    but i know my frnds barely got any sex ed and that is WRONG. and that theory of well-maybe-they-will-go-out-and-try-it is not right...they are hearing about it anyway from tv, media, movies, friends, they might as well hear about it from an educational source. those who want to go out and do it, will , and those who know better, won't, simple as that.
    its up to the parents to instill the moral and/or religous reasons why they should wait till marriage and follow up on what tehir kids are doing to make sure their hormones dont get the better of them
    but the sex ed is a MUST!!!
    Arab Lady and Qwaider,
    Our education is suffering. But, this doesn't mean we can't tackle both problems. Sex ed is important and should be a priority too.
    You too can have your Memories Documented

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